For years now, I have had long term bondage and encasement of various sorts on my bucket-list. One of the top things was doing 24 hours in the gimpsuit. There had been a few attempts that didn't go to completion for various reasons, so until 10-29-2012 this had gone unfulfilled.
Apparently after whining to Rocket enough times that i didn't spend enough time in the gimpsuit, he decided NOW would be the time that I would do my 24 hours. In this particular matter, if I wanted to be obedient, this was not going to be optional -- this required some preparation on my part.
To prepare for my imprisonment, I was told nothing but liquids starting Sunday at noon. This might sound easy, but from start to finish, I had nothing solid, and ate nothing but slimfast. I fast learned to hate the taste of chocolate slimfast drinks -- It didn't take long, after number 3 or so I dreaded them :)
Upon arrival at Rocket's on Monday, I was told that I should clean out, install my electro butt plug, and get in the gimpsuit. We made short work of that, and within 30 minutes or so, i found myself chained to Rocket's bed, with electro in my ass, very immobile. He then told me I was going to drain a fully charged Erostek 312 box with my butt plug (I thought he was kidding). After draining the entire battery he switched it out for another electro unit.
Here is a photo of how I found myself:
After spending about 7 hours like this, he let me up and transferred me to the couch so I could relax. Eventually, he put restraints on my wrists and clipped them together until it was bedtime.
Upon entering the bedroom, i found the bed made up with a rubber sheet, a rubber pillow, and a rubber cover for me to lay under.
It looked amazing!
For sleep, I had wrist restraints and ankle restraints locked close together, with a short chain from my wrists to my ankles and then to the bed. Rocket was nice and let me take my sleeping meds to help me sleep, as i am an insomniac and rarely sleep more than a few hours a night without help.
Regardless of pharmaceutical help, I still only managed to sleep from about midnight to 5am or so, probably due to excitement, anticipation -- I will admit, comfort was never a issue.
Some time after I woke up, I had THE 'moment'. My brain decided that I had enough, and I wanted the fuck out - after thrashing around a bit, and having a little moment of panic, I settled down. Those that know me, know that this is NOT a moment that I will experience very often -- something about it brought it out, and it was amazing.
A large factor contributing to this is one very simple thing -- if i called out to Rocket to come let me out of bondage and the suit (which was not likely), it was pretty much guaranteed that not only would i NOT get out, but he would add bondage, and just generally make my situation more intense.
With that idea dominating my thoughts, I let out a deep sigh, and from there on I was totally in subspace -- I wasn't totally immobile, I wasn't gagged, there was no electro or anything causing me distress, but i was trapped, and had no easy out.
Around 9:30 or so, Rocket came in to see me after he had awoken. He laid with me for awhile, and then tied me spread-eagled to the bed and slowly worked my cock, while I stewed in the final hour of my imprisonment.
Eventually he allowed me to cum for the first time in two weeks -- as a reward for making it the full 24 hours without any issues. After my orgasm, he told me I had another 30 minutes before release.
I was spent, stewing in my own sweat, and still bound tight to the bed.
Rocket suddenly says "I want you to piss."
"On the bed?" I responded
"Yes, on the bed." He says.
I pissed all over myself, and onto the rubber covered bed as Rocket slowly brought himself to orgasm over my bound form. It was an amazing ending to an amazing 24 hours.
Not only had I successfully completed my 24 hours in the gimpsuit, but I had done it with a plug in for the entire duration. I broke 2 barriers with this experience -- Longest time with a butt plug, and longest time in full coverage.
All in all, it was one of the more memorable experiences I've had. The only thing that worries me is his words shortly after i was released -- "I guess 48 hours is next."
There were a few unexpected side effects of this imprisonment:
1) I have a HUGE affinity with the gimpsuit (more so than before)
2) That was the BEST lunch I've ever had.
3) That was the BEST shower I've ever had :)
4) I HATE slimfast, but it's worth it (can one have a slimfast fetish)
I recently took a play-cation to visit a friend I have been talking to for a very long time. One of the things that struck me prior to the visit was how he seemed to be digging for information about my likes and fantasies harder than anyone ever has before. Me being me, I started to wonder why.
After a lot of thought on the matter, I realized some things:
1) Knowledge is power - The more you know about each other, the better time you will have.
2) Be Honest - If you'd like to try something, and are a bit nervous about it, or have concerns, voice them.
3) Dark fantasies do not have to be reality -- but they can be rooted in it.
4) Mind fucks can be more powerful than sensations - knowing someone well makes this possible.
There are a lot of questionnaires going around right now for BDSM to help you get in touch with your perspective playmate better. In my opinion this does not replace good old-fashioned chatting and getting to know each other. Additionally, sharing some photos, videos and stories that you enjoy the most can tell someone quite a bit about what you like.
In the end I was more open than I had been with anyone previously about some of my really deep dark desires. The result of this was an amazing visit, with great play, and i got to cross several things off of my bucket list.
For a long time now I have sort of introspected myself to figure out how I've come to the place that I am now. It's been a pretty interesting journey and it makes me think back to my roots a bit -- where all of the feelings associated with fetish and kink began. This is my story as well as i can remember it....
I first started getting the kink stirrings at an extremely early age -- in fact I was tying myself up with ropes, chains, belts -- really anything I could get my hands on before I could even manage an erection -- My best recollection puts it at somewhere around 9 years old or so. I can recall a LOT of bathroom self bondage from about 9 - 17 years old.
As a result of a childhood surgery and some subsequent medication I had a pretty rough and very early puberty -- At about 10 years old, I went from four foot something tall to around five and a half feet tall. As a result it was pretty painful, I had the TERRIBLE mid-pubescent voice, and of course the sexual stirrings began. It was at this point bondage/gear and sexual feelings began to be intertwined.
Somewhere in my tenth year, I had my first orgasm. Like many bondage lovers and fetishists, I did not have it purposefully so to speak. I had my first orgasm tied up on my bedroom floor, in self bondage with bicycle inner tubes ( apparently I was at least a little inventive even then ). As a young male that had never experienced this before, I was terrified -- I had NO idea what just happened, all I knew what that I LIKED it, and bondage was how I arrived there.
For about the next four or five years, I didn't have an orgasm without bondage. It wasn't until I was about fifteen years old that I actually 'jerked off' in the traditional sense. At sixteen I had a girlfriend (Yes a FEMALE), who liked to tie up boys, and I bought some of my first 'real' bondage gear.
At either 16 or 17 I bought my first latex (like one young @divepup) -- and I didn't cheap out, I had a latex catsuit as my first piece of purpose-built fetish attire. I was hooked, and continue to be to this day -- clearly.
At seventeen I met my first gay male partner for a play date -- he lived 100 miles away, and it was quite a drive. I was shaking and having second thoughts when i pulled up at his house. All i knew was I wasn't going to back down and I didn't -- a little chit-chat and some pizza, and we did the deed (This should be it's own blog entry).
From the sum of these experiences and experimentation, and a lot of great friends and experiences since, I learned my sexuality and my fetishes.
Is it expensive, complicated and time consuming? Yes -- definitely!
Would I trade it for anything? NEVER, vanilla sex is boring :)
While I was visiting San Francisco last year, I was talking with Mikey (bndgkid) and the folks over at SeriousMaleBondage about self bondage adventures. Mike had recorded a video about being caught in self bondage by his dad, and it rekindled some memories, one of which I thought i would share here.
When I was in college, I spent a lot of time on ebay looking at (cheap) bondage gear. One of the purchases that I made, that i still have, is a Posey Straitjacket.
As most of the bondage folks know, a straitjacket isnt too much fun by yourself, as you have no one to put you in it. Creativity won the day, and I figured out a way to both put myself into it, and get myself out of it again, even using the side and front loops -- needless to say i was very proud of myself.
Without describing the entirety, we'll just say that it involved a rubber band around the friction buckle, and a closet door (the bifold kind). Pull the jacket over your head, get your arms/straps thru the loops, and the strap end through the buckle. Insert in the 'pinch' point of the closet door, push the door closed, and use it to pull the strap tight. Voila! SJ self bondage.
In 2004 we moved to a new apartment, which did not have bi-fold doors on the closets, but regular doors. This didn't seem to be a problem, as i could just use the pinch point to one side of the door.
In one particular case, I was doing just that, and pulled a bit more vigorously than usual, and *CLICK* the door shut with the strap in it. As you can imagine, i was in a straitjacket, tethered to the door, unable to move away, with no arms/hands to pull the door open.
I was very convinced i would have to wait for my roommate to get home to let me out, in what would be a very embarrassing explanation. However, i was able to get enough slack to get around and manage to use my elbow to open the door (this, after nearly an hour of struggling to get free).
Needless to say it was quite the adventure (and I will admit i was raging hard most of the time :-D ), and although i managed to get myself free, I never did do the posey self bondage in that fashion again at that apartment.
The Moral of the Story: If you HAVE to practice self bondage, make sure you have an out, think it through, and make sure you have an emergency plan (in my case, my roommate).
The first thing that comes to mind when posed the question is Trust, simply put.
When one considers it, trust (in this particular regard, especially) is very much a two-way street. By wearing a collar for Rocket, it shows that i trust him, and trust him to make decisions for me, both in and out of play. Conversely by putting his collar on me, it shows that he trusts me to be obedient, honest and open. I will admit, this is a poor way to put words to it, but I am doing the best I can.
A collar also signifies ownership -- not ownership as in 'property', specifically (though that is certainly one of the meanings involved). I am speaking of ownership as an emotional and physical bond between the wearer and the owner - something that transcends verbalization.
In my opinion, a collar is an achievement, a milestone -- the BDSM/Fetish equivalent of an engagement or wedding ring. This is more than simply a fashion accessory, it is trust, ownership, a sense of belonging, and of safety.
When we met, were either of us 'driving' toward a collar relationship? In a word -- no.
Something that makes this even more meaningful for me, is the fact that Rocket identifies as mostly sub/passive. What this means to me is that, although he identifies as mostly submissive, he feels strongly enough about wanting me to belong to him, that he is willing to pursue a relationship in this way. It is a big decision :)
A very special thanks is also due to Reddywhp, who is Rocket's long time partner, and without his blessing, this arrangement would not have been possible. He is a great guy, an experienced player and a huge computer nerd ;) I look forward to spending more time with him as well.
Have no worries, I fully intend on topping Rocket frequently…. after all, it IS my job to make him happy.
Stay tuned for more blogs -- one of my rules of ownership is that I must blog twice a week, and I plan to obey.
It has been a long time since i blogged, but I have to share my most recent life change.
This Tuesday, I was collared by Rocket, with the blessing of his partner (Reddywhp for those interested). For those wondering, there is no 'term' defined, and I will be in collar as well as in chastity when he desires.
Personally I hope that it doesn't end at all, i can't think of any reason i would ever want it to.
Here is some background of how this came to be:
As a lot of you know, since Rocket moved to Chicago, we have played regularly on Tuesday, and hung out quite a bit outside of that. We seem to be very much kindred spirits in a lot of regards, and have formed a meaningful connection in and out of the scene. It is difficult to put into words, but I care for him deeply.
A few weeks ago, we discussed my going into chastity for him. After a short discussion we decided that when we met again, I would go into chastity with no definite release period, and he would get the keys.
On Tuesday, after being put into Chastity and relaxing for a couple minutes he posed the question:
"How do you feel about being collared by me?" He asked.
I will admit, my response to it was less than graceful -- I think i stammered something out, I actually can't even remember what it was.
I was floored, it may sound like I am overstating, but my heart leapt -- I had butterflies. Those of you that know me, know that I tend to NOT be emotional about things, but this was amazing :)
Needless to say, I accepted and I'm extremely excited and very happy. I am lucky to be collared by him, and when i feel the collar, it still gives me butterflies.